KJ & 3rd Month of Power Pesco

BOOOOOO!

One time I was asked by girl B why I usually post what I eat in FaceBook. I said it's for my stalkers like her! haha! Jesus I'm so mean.

But seriously, I love taking fotos of everything. And there's something about food that I adore, esp those that I've cooked personally. To take a foto of what I've cooked is like receiving a certificate when you've done well in school. Yeah, just like that! and I love eating! that's why I joined the gym, so that I could eat anything.... or else I could have joined the BIGGEST loser!


Also, people had been asking me if it's hard to be vegetarian. Well, Im Pesco-Veggie, that means I can eat eggs and seafoods. Surprisingly, I easily survived 12 weeks of it. Perhaps time will come that I'll let go of seafoods, but I dont think it'll be soon. Perhaps I wont. Well who knows...


Anyhow, here are some of my masterpieces:


I had that when I was in Germany. My aunt's place is in front of a mall. It was a challenge for me to survive, even just for an hour, inside that mall alone. People don't speak English (well, majority of them) in Hannover. So to be able to order something "nice" to eat, even just by pinpointing at the fotos on the wall/menus and answering them back with just a smile and nod instead of saying "yes or No" was an accomplishment.



This is from an Ice Cream bar in Selfridges, Birmingham.


MacDo's Pancakes.


This I cooked last week; I have actually used Quorn sausages as an alternative. Quorn is made from free ranged eggs.

That I cooked last weekend; Those steaks are Quorn steaks.

Here's that spag My A had cooked last month. My A used Tofus and Quorn minced meat and seasonal veg in that spag.

Tofus and veg on top of rice.

Prawns and noodles.

Tomato soup and that veggie pasta which I forgot the name.

That is from a chinese resto: Vegetables and 3 seafoods combo

This I cooked recently as well, I'd like to pretend it's a cake but obviously it's not! It's prawn stir fry!

Ahh! I remember this, just last spring. It's honeydew melon shake (I personally made) on top of Cornish icecream.

My first lunch in Germany. My aunt ordered that. All I know is that it's a fish and some sort of creamy salad. She explained to me what the ingredients might have been, but unfortunately she said them in German so it was a bit non-sense really.

Ohhh...! I cooked this only last night! It's Quorn meat and vegetables in Indian Korma sauce.

This was baked exclusively for me. It was actually an experiment: a choco cake baked inside a tart by Chef Y.

And that is a freshly baked browny topped with cream and warm choco fudge. My A and I had it in Beefeaters, Birmingham.

So there! It's not really hard to be a cow.

Au Revoir!

Kris Jasper.

KJ and The Salt of this Planet

this is Kris Jasper actually talking:

Im annoyed whenever Im told that I (apparently) eat meat in secret, coz I bloody dont! Im new in this dietary lifestyle and is actually enjoying it at the moment. For fuck's sake, why would I eat meat in secret when I can just eat meat and blog about it! That will definitely be a good blog entry. Im Kris Jasper... Im frank and brutally honest. If I do something, it'll either end up in FaceBook, or I'll rant it here in Blogspot.

And also, I dont know why people expect me to elaborate why I've turned vegetarian? Now in extreme excruciating circumstances, just in case I decide to defecate every 5 days instead of everyday, do I have to explain it too?

Dont you think it's good to shake your life up at times and do things that not most of the world's population are doing? Dont you think it's boring to just get up every morning and eat same old boring food all day, spend your endorphins, pretend to be happy during the day, then go home from either school or work and finish your day with a non- deserved rest on your f*cking bed, or couch, or toilet (wherever you fancy)?

Dont you think this world will come into halt when ALL of us will consume the same food, drink same liquids, wear same clothes and practice same faith?

Think! If there is no variability in our society, then we are no different than ants.

KRIS JASPER.

KJ and the Big Bellied Woman

And it was yesterday when I decided to still go to work anyway. Half of me wanted to just stay on bed, I thought I might just pretend that I have at least 2 chronic diseases, perhaps recurring appendicitis and recurring fungal infection in awkward places then I'd just start claiming benefits from the government. But I decided to move anyway, perhaps when Im old, like 40, then I will start using that excuse.

I was supposed to stop by the gym before hitting work but I just couldn't be bothered with anything yesterday. I just ate and ate and ate and ate.... I've turned suicidal (this is where I'd insert a sad emoticon).

Then as if I have been sucked by "time warp" (just in case it does really exist), I instantaneously saw myself inside the lite railtrain, on my way to work. And in that lite railtrain (on my way to work) I was wearing my striped blue TopMan shirt, bootcut TopMan jeans, Doc Marts Boots and Blue SuperDry lumberjack hoodie. And the light rail was packed by those things we call humans, humans of all sorts. I was tired and sleepy so I didnt bother to offer my seat; mind you, I could not be bothered to even breathe yesterday. I was more bothered with the fact that I didnt wear my sunglasses when the sun decided to come out at mid-day.

But there was this mid-aged woman who I thought was struggling with life, if you know "dyspnea in labour" then you could probably imagine her. With a fake smile and foreign accent I offered my seat. When the deal was done, that's when I saw that she wasn't pregnant afterall, she was just fat! Pfft! I have been robbed.

Jesus, I'm so bitter. Perhaps I should move on....

My A is at work last night so there was no one I could annoy. I thought of pretending I have an imaginary friend just so I have someone to talk to but I remembered: I'm actually not a toddler and I'm just borderline crazy, not full time, so I killed my imaginary friend before he could talk.

The most exciting part of my weekend is my application to volunteer for 2012 London Games. I will now wait to be called in for a "face to face" interview (that's what I got in my confirmation email).

Roughly the question will probably be "What can you offer the Olympic Team?", to which I'll just reply "My fake smile and foreign accent".

GoodBye!



Kris Jasper.

KJ & the Contemporary Futuristic Pop Poet

Nice to be appreciated by strangers. Well, she's not actually a stranger coz she's my doctor's receptionist.
It started when I walked inside and apologized for being a minute late (or was it 5 minutes)... Then she asked me if Im a Popstar coz she said (I'll quote her) "Your hair is Fab!" then she motioned her hands to her head and raised her hands up as if describing a spiky hair (or perhaps she was doing magic spells, i dont knw). I thought it was offensive coz she's mistaken me for being deaf and there's no need for sign language but of course we dont want to insult nice people. So I just said "Thank you" and smiled.

But receptionist perhaps has no friend to talk to this morning coz she shared her experience to me when she went to London last weekend. Well, there's a reason why I went to see my doctor today and I wasn't really interested about that stranger's life, I was hungry, sleepy and in pain but as she was nice to me so I reciprocated the gesture. I listened to her stories & pretended to be interested..

Mind you, I nearly asked her if she's in Facebook but I did not bother.

Then I was called in by my doctor. After minutes of pleading & bargaining she AT LAST prescribed what I want, err I meant need.. And I went home happy. VERY HAPPY!

Anyway back to why Im making today's post. I watched Youth in Revolt and in that film I discovered Contemporary Futuristic Poem... Not actually sure if that's what they called it but who cares? I just thought it's a cool type of poetry. All you'll do is combine words and leave everything to your audience' imaginations. I'll have a go & we'll call this poem as Bathroom...

ahem ahem*

BATHROOM.

Tiles water
brush toilet
showerhead spray
cabinet shelves
light tablets mirrors defecate.

bath rugs
holes receiving shampoos
toothpaste tissue
taps chemicals
toothbrush windows bars and poo.

bathtub soaps
towels shavers
curtains water
diarrheas ventilate bubbles in hair

floating feces
creams and suds
haircaps mouthwash
electric lights
sink and silvers
doors boats rubber ducks
constipated earbuds

wirings plastics
cold intubates
condoms pills
plasters chills
plastic floating ducks
masturbates


There! Dont say it is ridiculous coz it is not! It is a proper form of poetry and Im proud to have composed that!

Goodbye.


Kris Jasper.

KJ & the NO MEAT Diet

And today's Monday... Already Tuesday in some countries, perhaps Sunday to some lunatics.


But it's Monday (night) here in the UK and we'll stick with that.

I feel weird updating my site coz til recently, I usually update this every 4 weeks (or 8 weeks more likely).

Well, I had an amazing day today. It started last night when I checked the weather app in my phone and the weather gods promised me a cold/gloomy day, with rain showers as freebies. So today I wore a plain white shirt from Topman, my dark denims from RiverIsland, light grey waistcoat from FCUK, my RiverIsland leather boots and the icing on that cake is my Superdry scarf. I thought as it'd be cold and gloomy I'd wear scarf...

BUT unfortunately, there was no gloom, no cold winds, no rainshowers... All there was today was a brilliant summery sun and blue skies that could make any miserable cow smile.

With a heavy heart (and pail of salty sweats), I continued living my life... I wont let that person (whoever it was who predicted today's effin' weather) ruin my Monday coz I knew I looked good! If with some (MORE) bad luck and I tripped in the lite railway and I accidentally fell to some bland, lifeless heterosexuals... Im sure they would have kept me in their handbags and brought me home.

Sometime today I was, unfortunately, had been called "scruffy". I already forgot how pleasing it is to argue and win over an argument but I stayed cool... I wont let anyone ruin my first day of the week.. It's unfortunate that not everyone knew that what I have in my face is not just 10 days old worth of facial hairs. It actually has a name... it's called CELEBRITY STUBBLE.
My daily existence is surrounded by common people, so to argue about style and fashion is actually senseless.

Then later today I accompanied "my A" to the other side of town. And again, I was told off all evening. From my weight loss, to my lack of geographical knowledge of this city, to my ignorance about fish species, to my shrinking ass...

Much later in the evening I went to Tesco's and bought these meat alternatives...

Afterwards, with a bleeding heart I went home.

This is Kris Jasper actually talking:

There are few things I cannot understand...

Why do I have to explain to others my shift to (pesco) Vegetarianism? If I stop inhaling oxygen and choose Carbon Dioxide instead, do I have to explain it too?

Why do people say you have eating disorder when you lose weight? I feel fine and I know I look terrific so I guess I should leave it as that.

And also, just because I only know one kind of fish (which is goldfish), why is it that Im branded as ignorant? Ok fine, I know more fish species than one, but is it a crime if I thought what I ate 3 days ago was milkfish, when in fact it was, what was that again... a fucking sea bass? Well who the fuck cares? I still think they both look like twins (milkfish and sea bass). I ate it, I swallowed it, I defecated it!

Perhaps Im too random. I'll say what I think and I dont censor it. I know usually what I "thought/think" isnt always right, but is that reason enough to "label" me? Where in the Bible does it say that it is a crime to be "honest and naive" and is punishable by counter insults? Ok... I'd rather be a random, honest "ignorant" young man.. than be an old, boring, non classy, smelly bastard.

GoodBye.

KRIS JASPER.

(apologies for venting out)